Michel’s Blog Stardate: 1/4/2018 #1

I’m really not a Star Trek fan, I’m actually a huge Star Wars fan if you know anything about this, you know you are only allowed to be one or the other, not both. Just like our politics, but I’ll leave that for another blog.

Hi, I’m Michel. Until now, I’ve only shared my story with a couple of very close people, but now I feel the need to start sharing more publicly. Don’t worry, I’m going to start slow so as not to come on too strong and blow you away too fast. I’ve been in the IT business well over 20 years now. I’ve also been diagnosed as bipolar. I’ve had not much success with doctors or pills. Most doctors I’ve encountered have been more interested in pushing me pills than trying to actually get inside my head, fortunately for them because I’d probably end up just making them crazy. I’ve become much more spiritual in recent days than ever before by some major changes in my life and many new doors seemed to not just open wide, but almost fly open and swallow me. In this new frame of thinking I’ve come to the decision that God made us all the way he did for an intended purpose or purposes. That’s not to say our destiny is already lined out for us or that we are all following on a specific path that we don’t have the freedom to veer away from, but that he gave us certain features and differences for a reason. And we are each supposed to follow our own path to explore our time on this Earth however we best see fit.

Since the lows and highs of what you call bipolar can sometimes take me in too extreme of places, I’ve been trying to learn to channel those emotions into something more productive than laying in bed for days on end. I’ve been trying to channel them into my artwork. Now I embrace my moments of lows and pour those emotions into paint or designing some object out of tech stuff. I believe all the best art was created with pure, raw, hardcore emotions. It’s my belief that if you make a true artist take your pills we would not have some of the best artwork: music, photography, paintings, sculptures, movies, TV, digital art or whatever else you can think of today. When you think of the best songs you’ve ever heard, don’t you feel like you’ve been provided your own special window into the heart and soul of the writers and performers in that specific moment in time however short or long-lived it was when that song was created? It’s a way for the artist(s) to live on and always remember those moments through their art and we all were fortunate enough to be allowed to share in that experience with them. That’s the way I feel when I hear a truly awesome song or look at a truly moving piece of art.

It’s now my turn to try my best to share with you my pure, raw, emotions through my art. I’m just beginning this journey, so I probably suck at properly putting out there what I’m truly envisioning at the time, but I’ll continue to learn and grow with my art and hopefully it will be more spectacular with time. I hope others with this bipolar “disorder” (your label, not mine) will find your outlet to help you through the darker times. As I always say though, most people seem to focus only on the dark side of the ordeal and not the highs. Well, if you take away my low, you also take away my highs and I’m not going to let you do that anymore. I like myself just the way I am and I’m pretty damn sure God does too, he/she’s told me so on numerous occasions.

-Michel